Feb 18, 2010
Change Your Reading Materials!
You know what’s keeping you in the crazy mode about being pregnant , and anticipating the birth of that cutie pie? The books you are choosing to read. That’s right!
Think about it! Every pregnancy book on the market tells you the standard, basic information about pregnancy and birth. That’s why publishers are making so much money becaue, mom, you’re looking for something different than the same’ole, same’ole stuff (I know if you could, you’d hire someone to go through labor for you). It’s okay, I understand.
The mechanics of pregnancy and birth are the same for every woman on this planet, no matter what country she comes from! So how many books can you read on the same “mechanical” process? There’s nothing new, and the process hasn’t changed in thousands of years.
What’s IS refreshing is learning how to change your mindset! You already know, for the most part, how your body works. But how you think, and how this can influence your birth? Not to many books on that one.
Having a baby is so life changing in so many areas. Here are a few topic suggestions to read , focus on instead. You can save the birth process questions for your doc or midwife – they know all about it.
10 Topic suggestions, here we go:
1. How to relax – meditation, visualization, why it’s important to avoid images of flowers opening etc., before 36 weeks gestation. Stress can influence the birth process in ways you can’t imagine physiologically. You want to learn and focus on inducing the relaxation response for birth as well as using these skills for a healthier life. Learning these skills are very beneficial to you and baby.
2.Parenting.Believe it or not, YOU are your child’s first role model from the moment they are born. They may not talk right away, but they will mimik your behaviors. So if you’re a nose picker, most likely your kid will be one too. They will learn more from you then their peers, your attitudes, your language, you beliefs, values, and so on. So beware, be wise and learn about these things BEFORE cutie pie is in your arms.
3. Fear. Everyone experiences fear of some sort. The unfortunate thing about fear is it usually is self induced by our personal lack of confidence in something. I remember being scared to death to be a parent and I wasn’t going to have children. Thankfully I did – it’s been the BEST learning and rewarding experience in my life. And there lies why it’s important to understand where your fear comes from, why you should understand and learn from them. If you get mad at your kid, it isn’t enough to just say “Because I said so!” You are behaving that way because it was something you learned from your own upbringing. When it comes to childbirth though, lots of fear surrounds you. Understand it and you’ll minimize it. Good books to read about this are ones by Rhonda Britten – Fearless Living.
4. Intuition.As a society we forget that we were all born once to a mom, good or bad. Basic instinct played a role in our birth. And do you recall the word “imprinting” of species? You and I are of the Homo Sapien Sapian species. When any newborn comes into the world their first instinct is to follow the scent of mom. Mothers have a unique scent that baby responds too, and by the way is an important success factor in breastfeeding. Intuition is that “gut” feeling, the “hunch” we get about something and usually causes us to act on it. It’s present during childbirth and women are not taught how to use it. Books by Laura Day can teach you.
5. Communication. The first 3 months after birth, baby sleeps, poops,pees, and eats. That’s about it until one day baby looks at you as if they were meeting you for the first time (about 2 – 3 months old). Babies do communicate through hand gestures and crying. As the parent your job is to be the detective that figures out what the needs are. As toddlers they can’t speak words yet, but they sure make noise and a lot of it if their needs aren’t met. Learning how to communicate with your little one may be the arsenal you need to keep the “terrible two’s” away. If you understand your child’s needs you’ll be able to bypass many headaches. Learn the cues, the sounds, the gestures.
6. Love and sex.If you think your marriage won’t change after having a baby, then you’re living in ” Never Never land”. Everything changes. There have been situations where dads get jealous of the baby, where rates of domestic violence rise, where lack of communication begins, sex has a slow death, and possibly feelings about yourself goes down the toilet. It’s important to face the unexpected changes in your relationship with your man, and even your friends. Love changes, once a lover, now you’re a mother. You might get “prudish” about sex and refuse to play around like you once did. Learn now. Have these discussions with your partner to have an idea of what may come and how you can keep the romance alive for years to come as parents.
7. Boundaries.If all goes well, you’ll have in-laws and your own parents knowing when to go home and butt out of your parenting rituals and philosophies. Yet, you may not. Learn how you can gingerly, or demand respect as a new parent. People are amazing. It seems like with any major life event some folks need to fill their own agenda. Like a grandmother who is overbearing and wants to take over being the “mother” – in a way it’s to keep mothering you, her “baby”.
8. Greeing your home.Geez, what better time to learn about this one! It’s obvious to me there is a major epidemic of products used that are loaded with toxic chemicals. Everything from clothing right down to the materials the crib is made out of to the mattress baby sleeps on. As parents we try to keep our kids healthy and safe. This is a safety and health issue. Get educated, take action before baby is crawing on the floor.
9. Baby care and development. What are you planning to do? Will you be fortunate to stay home? Will you have to go back to work? Avoid waiting last minute on this one. Sometimes day care centers fill up. So learn your options before hand.
The first year of life for babies is an amazing time for them, but for you as well. Their little brains are wired well before they’re born. Learn how to encourage their physical growth and stimulate their incredible little minds.
10. Journaling. Keeping a journal is a wonderful way to relive memories, problem solve, and a great gift for your kids. Kids grow up thinking you no nothing about life right? You had sex? OMG!! You can leave them a history, a story of your life and theirs on paper to last a long time, possibly from generation to generation. I write my son letters every now and then and look forward to the day when he is ready to receive them. Purchase a beautiful blank book, or decorate one to make it special. There are many books on journaling and how the simple act of writing can do so much for you – may even prevent the “baby blues”!
There is no doubt that having a baby – or learning how to have a baby is important. But all these reading suggestions will prepare you for parenting and being a parent because you will have gained valuable insight that will assist you now and for years to come.
Lesly 
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